Okay this is once again a question that I find crops up time and time again, and thought while I have been a little controversial all ready I might as well keep going lol.
Okay I now I guess this can apply to people that are to be considered BF & GF or partnered, either way I think the same question and arguments will apply.
At this point I will add my own personal disclaimer ;) I refuse to take any responsibility for separations, divorces and any other form of SL abuse as a result of this post :)
Now we all have been or are in a relationship in SL, and the battles seem to rage as they do in RL.. it's the old thing of should a person that has a BF/GF or partner dance with other people?? And for that matter is it right to be seen talking to another person who is of the opposite sex?
I have seen many couples that have been together have there friendship or relationship break down as a result of a simple chat or dance.. Now everyone's rights and wrongs are different but its interesting to find out peoples opinions and perspective on this? And is that still wrong to do if its a close friend?
A good question Jester and one that I think most people on SL have asked themselves at one time or another.
ReplyDeleteAs with RL I think its possible to have friends of the opposite sex online without it being a problem but as with all relationships I think it comes down to trust. The problem with SL or online relationships is it tends to be far harder to trust, as often the person you’re with is in a different time zone and therefore time together is short and sometimes sporadic depending on RL commitments and needs. Dancing is a part of the SL culture so I think it would be wrong to just assume that if seen dancing with someone other than your partner, you were being unfaithful. Not to mention that actually, no-one knows what is being said in IM’s whether you’re dancing or not – so is it really worth worrying about?
ok I totally agree with Goodnight55.Lets face it this is something that is perculiar to SL as in RL it appears to be ok to dance with another woman or man, yet in SL which seems to be full of insecurities it is a major issue. Just look at GF/BF in SL, they have to wear tags to say mr X is mine, in other words " Hands off him" or vice versa. It is all about trust & if people have trust issues with their partners,GF/BF then they need to sit down & talk.
ReplyDeleteGoodnight is right whe she says the time zones make it harder to trust. Also yes it is true the person your partner is dancing with might be reading their email.And just to give you food for thought, how many of these gorgeous women are really men behind the avatar & vice versa. So I say relax & trust . SL is about having fun, not looking for things to stress you out.
Well thank you Goodnight and Anonymous for both your comments, and yeah you have both raised to valid points. Its very true that even if your with your respective other half there is always that possibility that they or even you are in a IM with someone else. So for that fact each and everyone of us has the potential to be saying or doing anything with anyone.. and your don't even have to be in the same region to be having that IM..
ReplyDeleteAnd yes it is a case that you have to trust your respective other halves to be saying or doing what they admit they are doing. So thinking of it in this context, if your dancing with someone it is more than likely that your doing far less than some people are doing in IM.. And as Anonymous has said the truth of the fact is you really don't know who's on the other end of the chat. You could as said be talking to someone other than who or what you think they are..
So based on the comments so far, yes I agree that dancing is part of the SL culture but many people see that simple act as a true break of faith and trust. Also it has been said that it looks bad on that persons other halve if others were to see them dancing with another person. Now I can see that point of view, and I am sure if we logged into SL to a load of people telling tales about your partner it wouldn't be the best thing to arrive in world to.
But I guess it does depend on who the people are and the way things are dealt with should this happen, I have seen some real nasty fall outs from people that have dare I say this danced with someone... God knows what was said in IM but just for the fact of the dance.
Maybe I am being a little daring but I don't see the issue of the dance when so many other far worse, as Goodnight said can be going on in a IM... Maybe Goodnight would like to explain which things might be said in IM, it might give us a balance on the balance of dance compared to IM :)
I await that reply with eager anticipation :)